By now they were near the village to which they were going, and he acted as if he were gong farther. But they pressed him: “Stay with us. It is nearly evening–the day is practically over.” So he went in and stayed with them.
When he had seated himself with them to eat, he took bread, pronounced the blessing, and then broke the bread and distributed it to them. With that their eyes were opened and they recognized him; whereupon he vanished from their sight. They said to one another, “Were not our hearts burning inside us as he talked to us on the road and explained the scriptures to us?” Luke 24:28-32
When I was a teenage boy, for some reason, I was always expecting miracles, especially on Christmas. However, it never happened. Maybe I was expecting something silly. One kind that only exists in fantasy tales.
When I grew older, it came a time that I stopped to believe in miracles. Maybe I realized that was stupid to expecting something such miracle to be happened. In truth, I even did not know what did I expect to be happened. In return, I felt a bit dissapointed. I was completely closed my believe to any kind of miracles. I was not sure whether I also inclined to leave away my faith, as a result of this dissapointment. What I remembered, at that same period of my life, there were some changes inside me too. Influenced by some important experiences, I began to realize that I am weak and need somebody to lean on. It was not as same as you feel with a girl or a need to affection; it was more about realizing what it means to be alive and human.
The more I felt that way, strangely I also experienced more which turned to be an unexplainable experiences to my life. Those kinds that make you feel that it was not you who made them, but something or someone who invisibled and have more power than yourself, make them became possible for you to have. After seven years in college, I was be able graduating from my minor degree. I finally made decision to quit the job that I did not want to take, and I finally took a serious look to join the Society of Jesus. It was like taking a great flight, which did not only need courage and great effort to make them come true, but more important there should be a miracle which turned what impossible become possible.
There I was, after giving up to believe that miracles do exist, suddenly I met with my first experience to miracle. To be honest, it was only a beginning. Since then, I saw more miracles coming to my life. I even dare to say that more will come along to my life in the future.
One thing that I learned from it; the more I understand and accept my reality and its weaknesses, the more I see there were many miracles along my life. The more I may be able counting my graces and blessings that I had in my life, the more I see how I should be grateful about my life. I felt that I had been loved, not only by people that I had met all my life, but by something greater than that. It seems there is somebody that always stayed with me, even whenever I did not feel the same. In short, I felt love itself which bring hope and trust that I never had before. They led me to see the real miracle in me, which is no other than the whole story of my life itself.
Though it still scarry for me to understand such things exist within my life. Above all, I was afraid and weary since I knew for sure that I am not worthy to experience such great things. Who am I that make God willing to lay his power in me? or more important, what God wants me to do by doing these to me?
Still I felt uncapable to do anything that he wanted. However, that makes the thoughts of miracles more real than before …
of dreams, miracles & something more 